Change is inevitable in life. From growing up to growing apart to moving on with your life, things will change both when we do and don’t want them to. And that can be a hard concept for kids to grasp. Change is a scary thing when you’re young. After all, the big bad world is out there, and so many different things can happen that the kids might not even know about.
Even as an adult, that’s a scary thing to think about. But as a parent, you don’t want your children to be afraid of change. Yes it can be bad, but it can be good as well! And even when things take a turn for the worse, you can always find some lightness in the situation, and a bit of hope for the future.
As such, we’ve listed below some great ways to help your kids adjust and get ready for the changes in their life. Being a parent involves having some hard talks sometimes, but once you’ve got through it, your child’s life will improve for all the better. So here’s what to keep in mind.
Let Them Talk
It’s easy to sit down with your child and tell them things are going to be fine, and there’s nothing to worry about, but this can accidentally silence them. Of course, you don’t want them to dwell on a change anymore than necessary, but they’re always going to have questions that need answering.
So it’s best to sit down and just let them talk. Tell them this is a free space where they can say what they truly think and feel, and then let them rip. They might have a lot to get off their chest or they might need a little encouragement – either way, this is a chance for both of you to get on the same page.
Remind Them that Change Doesn’t Have to Be Bad
Like we said above, change isn’t always bad. The bad things in life tend to affect us the most, but even positive changes can be scary to face and settle into. Attending a new school after being bullied at an old one, for example, is a good change that’ll really help your child to thrive. But they might be worried it’s all going to happen again.
Take this moment to remind them that this change is good, that not all schools are bad, and then tell them what to do just in case teasing does occur. Reminding them that they’re not powerless in this situation, alongside reminding them that sometimes the changes we make are for our own benefit, will always help.
Try to Reduce Any Impact on Their Regular Routine
Routines are what we thrive off of in day to day life. A routine ensures we get up on time, eat when we need to, have all tasks ticked off, and get to bed again at a good time at the end of the day. And for your kids, this is their entire life! So if there’s a change in the family structure coming, or an emergency blindsides you, try to keep your family routine going.
For example, if you need to slip out to talk to family lawyers, do it when the kids are at school. If they don’t know any difference, they won’t be affected by signs of disruption. And once you know what you’re doing as their parents, you can then sit down altogether and talk it through properly.
Show Them They Can Make Their Own Decisions
Making your own choices is something kids can miss out on. They’re kids, and they don’t know much about the world yet, so you do most of the critical thinking for them. And while that’s not going to change for a while, you can allow them some influence over their life after a change has rocked their world.
You can go the extra mile to show them that their voice still matters. Even with little decisions, like what to wear, what to eat, and what to say to someone, are great ways to remind kids that change can be controlled by them. It’s not just something they have to go along with, and try to adjust to, even in the most harsh of circumstances.
Still Make Time for Fun
Making time for fun is essential during moments of upheaval. Kids love to have fun, and that’s what childhood should be all about. And even when the family structure is changing, or you’ve lost a loved one, moments of happiness can still be enjoyed. One day your kids will look back on these times and the joyous occasions will stand out more than any other.
Go on more day trips together, cook and eat fun food, turn on something funny and sit down to watch it – all these things can act as good ways to bring laughter back into your household. A bit of fun helps us to feel like we can face the world, and that has a double effectiveness when you’re a child.
Remember, You Don’t Have to Know All the Answers
Even with these tips, it can be hard to face changes yourself. So when your kids come to you looking for answers or approval, face them with honesty. You might be just as clueless as them, and you don’t have to pretend otherwise! You can simply look them in the eye and tell them that being together is all that matters, and you can face things as a family. A little bit of honest strength will really help.
Kids are incredibly resilient, and can bounce back from a lot of things. However, they’ll need guidance through change here and there to ensure they come out the other side healthy and happy. So keep these tips in mind when you’re anticipating some kind of lifestyle change in the near future. They’ll make all the difference in the way your child thinks and behaves.