Toward the end of last year I bled for 35 days straight. It was pretty traumatic – mostly because I (naturally) assumed death was imminent, but also because I had grand plans for a new baby in 2019.
Thankfully, after a bit of trial and error, the bleeding stopped but I had quite a wait to find out why it was happening, and what that would mean for my fertility.
After a scan and some blood tests, I met with a gynaecologist who reassured me I probably wasn’t dying, ruled out polycystic ovaries, but had no real explanation for why I had bled that long, or if it might happen again. I was told to get on with trying for another baby immediately, because it could take up to two years to get pregnant ‘at my age’ (which is 32 by the way, and didn’t seem all that old until my meeting with Dr Ladyparts).
I took the doctor’s advice on board and bought a bulk supply of ovulation sticks and pre-pregnancy vitamins, to help me sort out where I was with my hormones and get my body ready for a baby.
Because my periods had been all over the place, and I wasn’t sure what was a proper period, whether I’d been ovulating, or when I might bleed or ovulate next. I’ve been using the ovulation sticks since the middle of December, and they didn’t turn positive once.
Thanks to wonder of the internet, I was able to obsess all day about the reliability of ovulation tests (or OPKs, as they’re called on the forum boards) and look at other women’s results on Netmums TTC chat. I was very invested in the opinion of internet strangers who also wanted babies, and thought they were probably right when they said I’d missed ovulation by testing when I was too hydrated (meaning the hormone that makes the test positive would be diluted and not show up). I also ended up down a rabbit hole of looking at other peoples used pregnancy tests to ry and establish whether or not there was a faint line.
I had a light, ten-day bleed that finished a week or so ago which I thought was a period, so I began testing again in the week running up to ovulation. The tests were all negative with no build up to a positive, but I was still feeling pretty optimistic that I’d get some clue I was ovulating this month. Annoyingly, instead of getting a positive result on the day my app said I should ovulate, I got another period.
My trying to conceive plan for this year has already gone quite terribly. I’ve been mostly bleeding and being annoyed about how much I’m bleeding.
Hopefully my current bleeding situation is a real period and I’ll actually manage to ovulate this cycle. You’d think that it would be easy to make a baby when there’s supposedly nothing medical in your way. But it’s not. Which makes it all the more frustrating when your body doesn’t do what its supposed to.
I’ve already got two children, so I know my angst will seem ungrateful and insensitive to some. I’m aware of how whingey and pathetic I sound, but I’m so broody, my heart hurts when I think of the possibility it might not happen any time soon.
For now my mission is to get fit and healthy, so that if it does happen for us, my body will be the best house it can be for a baby. I’m hopeful that my trying to conceive journey won’t be a long one, and if that’s the case I’ll share it on here. I’m really nosey about other people who are trying for a baby and I’m more than happy to publicly overshare.
Feel free to share your experiences/success stories in the comments, I’m always keen to chat!