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Struggling to cope with loving yourself again after your divorce? Self love is a lifelong method to help you do just that. Discover more, here…
Getting a divorce in the UK can be an extremely unforgiving process. Not only do you have the emotional side of it all, you also have the financial burdens, and the stress of the proceedings too. This can be truly destructive on your mental health.
During this process, the importance of self love can’t be overstated. Throughout your marriage, you may have forgotten to put yourself first but, now the divorce is done and dusted, this needs to change!
Self love psychology can truly change your attitude to yourself and to life, especially after a tough divorce. So, to discover 15 ways you can learn how to practice self love and care, you came to the right place…
1. Pamper Yourself
First and foremost, it’s really important that you take some time, at least once a week, purely for you. Find some relaxing lavender bubble bath, get your favourite bath bomb, try out a new face mask, and just put your feet up. It varies from person to person, but whatever makes you feel as soothed as possible is the key here.
You can even practice this daily through simply keeping on top of your skincare routine, or even just through applying your makeup each morning. This time taken to make you feel more in-tune with yourself, as well as confident and relaxed, is paramount to loving yourself more.
Additionally, pampering yourself could also mean improving your appearance through cosmetic procedures. This doesn’t need to be major procedures like rhinoplasty or liposuction. You can start by enhancing your smile for example. Speaking of, you can check out this dentist in Germantown if you’re looking to achieve a brighter and straighter smile.
2. Try Something You’ve Always Wanted to Do
Self love is all about putting yourself first. In a relationship, you often have to take into account someone else’s feelings in all your decisions. But, especially after a divorce, you no longer have to do this!
So, why not do something you’ve always wanted to do. Be it a new sport, getting fit, arts and crafts, writing, or something extreme, like sky-diving, it’s up to you. Now is the chance to do everything you always wanted.
3. Do the Things You Love
Likewise, one of the best self love exercises is to keep doing the things you’ve always loved to do. Relationships can sometimes get in the way of your much-loved hobbies that you always loved at school or uni. Now, you can pick up where you left off, and start living your life how you want to live it.
4. Listen to Music
Going through a divorce can be painful, and it can seem as though you’ll never get out of the emotional rollercoaster you’re riding. Well, one way to try and make sense of these crazy emotions could be through listening to music.
Music has the extraordinary power to make you feel happier, and to come to terms with your feelings. Through hearing the lyrics of other people going through your situation, you might feel less alone. What’s more, music can put a swing in your step for the day ahead, so playing a mixture of songs could help you to build your new life.
5. Go Shopping
In a similar way, shopping also has this dopamine effect on your brain, which releases happy hormones to make you feel better. I’m sure there’s something on your wish list you never got round to buying. Or, maybe you’ve spotted something new in the shops you wouldn’t normally treat yourself to?
Well, the act of shopping, and waiting at the checkout, is enough to boost these hormones. So, why not give it a try? Obviously, purchase within your means, but just use this time to treat yourself; you deserve it.
6. Eat Nice Food
Eating a mixture of nutritious food which will enrich your body, as well as fatty feel-good morsels, is key to self love. Yes, you need to pay attention to your body’s needs, but it’s also important to give into those cravings every so often. This is sure to keep your relationship with food healthy, and give you the opportunity to treat yourself.
One way to get a real balance is by cooking for yourself more. When you eat out, you never know what ingredients they’ve added, but when you cook, you can be sure you’ve included a decent amount of veg to counteract the salt and cheese. What’s more, cooking is a real stress reliever, so you’re killing two birds with one stone!
7. Travel to New Places
Everyone wants to explore the world, in some way, shape, or form, and this can be one of the really worthwhile self love actions to improve your life. Perhaps there’s a city you’ve always wanted to explore, or you just want to sit and bask in the sun with a good book? Whatever your choice, getting a break from reality might be a nice change.
You could either invite your friends along for a fun ladies or lads holiday. Or, why not try travelling alone to feel truly liberated and free? Whichever you choose, pick somewhere you’ve always wanted to visit for the trip of a lifetime.
8. Start Writing
Another really great way to learn to express and understand your emotions could be through writing down your thoughts. This could be in a paper journal, like a diary, or you could even start a blog! Blogging is such a great way to connect with people going through similar things to you; through this, you might just create a supportive community to help you through.
9. Take a Break from Social Media
We all know of the toxicity that social media can often bring to our lives. Whether it’s a violent video that scars our mind, a fake picture of someone posing to the nines, or a negative comment which affects our mental health, it’s never-ending.
So, one sure fire way to practice self love is to remove yourself from social media every once in a while. Not only is technology proven to make you feel less relaxed, seeing negativity online can be really destructive. By steering clear from these negative outlets, you’re sure to feel more positive.
10. Practice Gratitude
Gratitude is something that can truly affect your mentality. Simply write a list of what you’re most grateful for at the start or end of the day. It could be anything as small as an “I love you” from a family member, or even a smile or compliment from a stranger.
By learning to live in the moment, and appreciate what you have in the now, you can really start to ground yourself. This can lead you to coping better with what’s going on in your life, and start to move on by appreciating what you still have.
11. Start Meditation
Mediation has also become a really popular method of relaxation and mindfulness these days. The act of taking even just five minutes of quiet time each morning to think about your feelings and live in the moment could truly help you to centre yourself.
12. Surround Yourself with Positivity
In a similar way to removing negative social media from your life, you should aim to do the same in real life too. Maybe there’s someone who, once you’ve spent some time with them, you instantly feel down and anxious?
These types of people are what we’d call “toxic”, and they’re really not worth sticking around for. Yes, it may be a struggle to remove them from your life, and yes, it might be painful. But, at the end of the day, you have the power to surround yourself with positivity, and the people around you are part of that. Choose wisely, and you can truly better yourself.
13. Socialise
Once you’ve got your non-toxic group of friends sorted, it’s about time you spent some time with them! Socialising with your friends is another way to start living in the moment, through laughing and reminiscing together. This way, your mind can be taken off any troubles you may be having, and you can just enjoy yourself.
14. Try Not to Care What Others Think
Another really great way to show self love is through not caring how others perceive you. In today’s world, we are so wrapped up in how people view us, either through the lens of social media or real life, that we forget our own identities. If you stop caring what others think of you, you’ll start to embody your true self, which is truly liberating.
15. Breathe
Finally, it’s super important to just take a chance to breathe. Whether this be during your morning meditation, before going to sleep at bedtime, or during a tea or coffee break, this can be so relaxing. Focus your mind on nothing more than the air filling your lungs, and leaving it again, and just enjoy the world around you.
Ready to Practice Self Love to Love Yourself Again?
Think you might try out some of these self love techniques to help you love yourself after your divorce? I’d love to hear which tips you think you might try in the coming weeks.
These tips are tailored for those going through a divorce. That said, they can be utilised at any stage of your life, especially right now, with lockdown well underway. So, if you find them at all useful, or have any more to add, do leave a comment down below, and let’s help each other love ourselves!