Warning: this is going to be a sickly sweet gushing post about my lovely boyfriend.
My boyfriend is the best. I’m not just being smug and gross and making all the single people feel bad this Christmas, I’m just happy with what I’ve got. He’s my ‘one’.
I often get people commenting on how much fun he sounds, not just friends, casual acquaintances too. He joins in, he’s great with our children, he humours me. We were in a fake band for years before we got together, we mostly just thought up album names and names for our side projects. We were a fit, everyone could see it and we should have got our act together a long time before we finally did.
This is why I feel lucky. I feel lucky to have found my perfect one. Some people give up before it’s their time. They bow out of the race early and marry Cyril, off some e-match site, who calls his living space an apartment (even though it’s just the downstairs back room at his mum’s house, but he thinks that counts because it’s kitchen adjacent) and owns a load of lizards.
And maybe you’ll be happy with Cyril for a bit, but you’re keeping him from his ‘one’, who is that little nymph (no, not nympho) from the sci-fi memorabilia shop on the high street. Cyril will also be shading you from your ‘one’, who may be right under your nose.
Then at 40 you’ll have an acrimonious divorce and all you’ll have to show for it is a gecko who side eyes you from his cage (and he will only side eye you; his eyes are on the side of his head so you’ll never get a full frontal look) and you’ll regret that you didn’t hold out that little bit longer.
So with my heart full of love and festive cheer and my belly full of Christmas carbs and half a glass of wine, I advise those of you that are still looking to wait a little longer. Those of you who are in my boat, I’m happy for you, do everything you can to keep it working.
I’m happy that I found someone who shares my interests and fits so well with me. I’m lucky to have that in life and I do appreciate what I’ve got. I’ll cut myself off before I get too over the top.
Don’t bow out. Don’t marry a Cyril. Everyone deserves to be as happy as I am.